Caring is creepy
by The Siren Of The Underworld
Summary: If Lisbeth Salander can't run away from something, fight it or just ignore it, then she will face it. But of course, then she must face the consequences as well. Lisbeth/Mikael.


A/N: Okay, I found this really old fanfic from mny archives and decided to post it here. My first try on writing about Millenium-trilogy, so be nice. And oh yes, it's pure Lisbeth/Mikael, because I still have hopes about them ending up together (hopefully the ending isn't way too corny). I have plans on publishing other works about Millenium, actually I have another one-shot already written and have started to write a long story too, so please look forward to them.

* * *

><p><strong>Caring is creepy<strong>

It was something around four on a freezing cold and already pitch-black afternoon in Stockholm. Since it was already December, they were playing those annoyingly cheery Christmas songs everywhere, not only in the smaller shops but also in the huge department stores like NK and Åhléns at the center of Stockholm.

People where hurrying to get their Christmas shoppings done and all of this was so totally not making Lisbeth Salander's mood any better. In fact, all that hazzle was making her feel even more pissed, if that was possible at all. It had been a month since Mikael Blomkvist had appeared on her doorstep, even though before that Lisbeth had done her very best to avoid him. And she had been doing it pretty well, until he had appeared. It seemed like that small and obviously innocent encounter had started something like a huge avanlanche inside her once again: after all, Mikael Blomkvist was still the same annoying (and way too attractive) man, who had recently saved Lisbeth's life, reputation and quite literally given her freedom.

About three years ago the two of them had spent some months isolated in a small cottage in Hedestad because of a job they were doing there together and suprise, suprise, they had started an affair. At first Lisbeth had thought that it was only sex (really good sex, that is), but nothing more. But after she had come back to Stockholm, she had realized that it wasn't just something like that, she liked Mikael much more than she wanted to admit. And after that creepy, blood-stopping realization Lisbeth had literally ran away from Sweden and spent a year travelling from one country to another. She hadn't said anything to anyone, not even a one goodbye or a message of letting other people know that she was leaving.

And why? Because she was afraid. Probably the first time in her adult life Lisbeth Salander was really afraid. Because of what she felt for Mikael Blomkvist. She liked him and cared for him far more than she wanted to admit, because Lisbeth Salander didn't want to fall in love with anyone. But whether wanted or not, she had fallen in love eventually. And what was even more annoying, that god-damn Mikael Blomkvist had proven to care to about her more than anyone ever, all his actions spoke for that. Even thought Lisbeth still didn't want to admit what she felt for him, she knew that the feelings did exist. And if possible, Mikael's visit month ago had made her realize that they were possibly stronger than ever.

As much as Lisbeth hated the situation, she had made a decision. She had been pondering what to do for a week now and then she had made a decision to conquer her fears. She had never been the type of person to let the fear get the best of her, so she had decided to march to the editorial of Millenium magazine and meet that fucking Kalle Blomkvist face to face. And that was where she was heading to at the very moment, and even though she had made her decision and all, she was still feeling annoyed and maybe a tiniest bit anxious.

She had her one last cigarette of courage in front of Millenium's front doors and after that she headed in holding her breath. She stomped the stairs up until she was at the office's lobby. Standing there at the shiny and bright space was one of those moments whe she felt really out of place. She noticed that the people working at the office gave her curious glances. She knew that it wasn't just her appearence (rugged anorectic punk-goth girl), but because they actually knew who she was. After all, their latest magazine was based on her god-damn life and how she had become a victim of goverment's conspiracy. So it wasn't really such a miracle that they were curious to see her in their editorial, but Lisbeth did her best to ingore their stairing and focused on her main task: finding that damned Kalle Blomkvist.

And she did spot Mikael almost instantly. He was talking to his co-workers Christer Malm and Erika Berger, who saw her coming before him, because Mikael had his back turned on her. Erika Berger stared at her like Lisbeth Salander coming to Millenium was the eight miracle in the world, but Christer Malm grinned to Mikael and nodded to Lisbeth's direction.

"I think you've a visitor, Mikael."

Mikael turned around and saw obviously akward (and maybe a bit anxious) Lisbeth standing on the doorway. He blinked in suprise, but then smiled warmly.

"Lisbeth... It's so nice to see you, didn't expect you to come here. Do you have a moment, I've more or less finished today's work, so we could go to coffee or something?" He asked as he came closer to her and Lisbeth could feel a strange warm feeling in her stomach as he came nearer and nearer.

"Sure," she mumbled in a expressionless way, afraid that her reply would make him see her anxiety.

"Great, well I'll see you tomorrow then!" Mikael said to his co-workers as he put on his jacket on, obviously not noticing the strange look Erika Berger gave him.

After Mikael and Lisbeth had left the editorial, they headed for the nearest Starbuck's café. As they sat there and drank their coffee, Mikael did most of the talking, which wasn't really all that unique. Lisbeth's obviously strange mood (well, at least stranger than normally), however, was quite unique, and Mikael had noticed it too. After they had spent more or less an hour in the cafeteria, Lisbeth couldn't stand the akward situation anymore and decided to head home. Mikael was probably afraid that she would once again dissappear and he wouldn't see her for months after that, so he offered to walk her home. Lisbeth didn't particularly want to get rid of him, so she didn't turn his offer down.

They walked in rather akward silence, and Lisbeth felt a strange ache in her chest as she stole glances of Mikael. The way his hair was blown by the wind, how he tried to adjust his collar better, how he could place his hand on Lisbeth's elbow gently in order to stop her from crossing the street when there was too much traffic... All that made Lisbeth long for him even more, but she had no idea how she could say such things to him and how he would react. She wasn't still sure how he really felt of her, and on the other hand what on Earth could she with her figureless and anorectic-looking body offer to Mikeal Blomkvist, who was famous of his adventures with beautiful women.

After they had reached the front doors of Lisbeth's house, she felt truly miserable. Nothing had gone as she had planned, not that she had any real plan what to do or say. For a moment she wondered what the hell had she been thinking to meet him in the first place.

"Lisbeth, I'm glad that you came to see me. You know I really want to be your friend," Mikael suddenly stated as they stood there face to face and placed his hand on her elbow.

Lisbeth felt the anger rising inside of her. Even though he most likely didn't mean it like that, his comment seemed to be mocking her.

"Well I don't wanna be friends, I don't wanna be JUST some fucking friends with you. I have never wanted that!" Lisbeth glared at him and tried to leave, but his hand had still a firm grip on her elbow.

"What the hell are you talking about? What do you want then? After all that has happened, I think you owe me an explanation. If I remember correctly, it was you who ran away in the first place and left me wondering what the hell had just happened!" Mikael was starting to get annoyed too at this point.

Lisbeth tried to struggle her way out of his grip and avoid looking at Mikael at the same time, feeling like a wild animal pushed into a corner. If she didn't leave now, she'd probably do (or say, which would be even worse) something she would regret later. But Mikael wasn't letting her go either, he had decided to get the truth out of her.

"Lisbeth, this is ridicilous... I just want the truth, okay? Can't we really talk about it?" Mikael pleaded, trying his best to get an eye-contact with Lisbeth.

"Well, I... Was... I was afraid, okay?" Lisbeth stammered, almost shouting and feeling more and more uneasy because of the turn their conversation was having.

"You? Afraid? Afraid of wh-?" Mikael was unable to finish his sentence as the realization hit him. What was Lisbeth Salander most afraid of? She was afraid of feelings. She was afraid of letting other people near her and letting other people touch her soul. She was afraid of what others might feel for her and even more so, what she might feel for them. That was why she was afraid of him. She was afraid of how she felt for him and what he might or might not feel for her. Suddenly it all made sense to Mikael.

"Lisbeth... I... I can't.." Mikael begun and sighed. He could see in Lisbeth's eyes that something which had been opening inside of her during their conversation was already starting to close.

"I can't really promise you anything. You out of all people know that I suck pretty bad when it comes to relationships. If there would be something serious going on between the two of us, I couldn't make any promises how it would turn out." Mikael ended and placed both his hands on Lisbeth's narrow shoulders.

Lisbeth looked at him suspiciously for a moment and then shook her head.

"You think I care for that? I don't want empty promises, I just..." She sighed and furrowed her brows.

"I just... want... you." She stated simply and gave him that strange and challenging look of hers.

That was probably the most direct reply Lisbeth had ever given Mikael, which made him realize that she couldn't have been more serious. This was probably the real reason why she had the very first time made a contact with him, then tried to run away and now had come to see him. Lisbeth Salander was probably the most unlikely person to be his girlfriend, but none of that really concerned Mikael.

"Oh, very well then..." Mikael muttered and then pulled Lisbeth for a kiss. For a smallest moment Lisbeth wondered what the heck was going on, but then she soon got caught in the moment. Because this was what she wanted. Or to be honest, she wanted even more.

And she was going to get some more, surely.

She was certain of that as she led him to the house.

She was certain of that as they got to the elevator, lips never parting.

She was even more certain of it as they reached her apartment and collapsed to the floor, because they couldn't waste even a single precious moment to wait until they would be in her bed.

She was certain of that as they were rolling on her floor on the top of each other, pulling clothes of, hungry for exposed skin, lips still never parting.

She was certain as hell that she was getting all that she wanted as she saddle herself on the top of him, letting out a small gasp of pleasure as she finally got him in the place she wanted him to be: inside of her.


End file.
